ask her if she still keeps all her kings in the back row

macy's('s) holiday gift catalog features overpriced silliness, creeper santa:

http://macys.shoplocal.com/macys/default.aspx?action=entryflash&

thanksgiving paper writing is admittedly totally lame, but im working 9 or 10 hour shifts on all the days until it is due, so. also, it says right on the syllabus that this is a "Shitty first draft" so I'm basically bsing all over it, AND i have almost tricked myself into thinking that what i'm really doing is training my pandora stations. also, i had my fun already when adam and i popped down to ncf :)

the goal was to finish up this paper and then start another class's rough draft tonight, but due to a serious motivational fail, that isn't actually likely. this paper WILL be finished up, though. it's okay, because adam has to work turkey day evening, so what we're probably doing is having what i've named Janksgiving Lunch*, and then I can do my work, so I'm none too stressed. I'm kind of hoping that his boss managed to find a replacement for that night so we can properly feast, although it'll mean a CRAZY sunday night-monday morning paper xtravaganza.


*Janksgiving will be seriously jank- we dont have a table and our oven doesn't work, so it'll be weird stove-top creations. itll be ludicrous and funny and ill take pictures for yall

don't worry-the latest episode of top model made me cry too! wtfffff? i think it's because erin is such a shitty bitch, her staying is always like a sock in the gut. also sundai's face looked so crazy sad. if erin stays one more round i'll freak out.

ALSO IN ENTERTAINMENT:

-Up made me cry for about the first half hour. it's so frigging genius, and I'm pretty sure pixar is the only movie company even trying anymore
-drag me to hell was a piece of vomity, predictable shit, and i'm mad at anyone who told me otherwise (92% on the usually trustworthy rotten tomatoes!! THE JEZEBELS LIKED IT.)
-finally saw tropic thunder and found it hilarious. GRANTED it's a lot of offensive humor, but the point was clearly that these are bad people that we're watching, so it worked for me, and I'm a Humorless Feminist. plus i was writing this review paper on post-post-modernism or some other made up nonsense, so it was really an academic viewing experience.

is this craigslist ad creepy, or do i just have my creep-dar jacked up to high?

"Santa is looking for a helper who can work three days per week, Fri, ,Sat, Sunday. Starting Fri November 20th. You must be good with public (children), shoot photos and more. You must be female, 18yrs. or older, bright disposition, good attitude, reliable and have transportation, Please contact Santa with photo and some backround.Call 727-545-1996 "


i think it's the please contact santa with a photo part. bleeerrr

http://www.someecards.com/card/this-halloween-you-dress-up-as-a-giant-silver-balloon-while-i-hide-out-at-home-not-doing-shit#

apparently i'm sick as shit right now, and it appeared out of nowhere last night. (i was doing homework and shivering, but when adam came home he was like, 'why is it hot as hades up in here?' and i realized that i was feverish and etc) SO that means i was probably incubating this fucker while i was there sharing airspace with the ladies and gent of the 307 and i had no idea, i promise.

chicken soup and homework night woo

i was supposed to have this evening completely free, but Professor McExtraAssignments was like, why don't you just write two pages on nuthin and turn a hard copy of that in. HOMIE SERIOUSLY this is a commuter campus, get with the program and let us email you when you assign bullshit like this. ANYWAY the only day I can turn it in is wednesday so I have to do it now. lamesauce, i guess.

HEY YOU GUYS maybe i'll be there saturday night. get pumped.

my god, glee. how do you manage it? how do you appeal to both my idealistic and cynical sides all in the same episode? also, KRISTIN CHENOWITH I LOVE HER.

online classes are basically alright, except for how they always want you to have "discussion threads" based on everyone in the group ANSWERING THE SAME QUESTION. all you can really say is "Interesting point! I agree!" because the question is always a variation on "standardized testing is bullshit, amirite?" and every person's answer is always a longer version of "Hells to the YES".

in other news, i was all OMGZ when am i gonna write that paper due wednesday??? then i looked at the info again and it's TWO TO THREE PAGES. on a toni morrison novel, and its about Major Themes, and she doesn't exactly hide those from you! so, the answer is, i can write that in my sleep.

i was asking myself just a second ago why am i watching a CW show called The Vampire Diaries, and the answer is that I CANT NOT WATCH SOMETHING LIKE THAT

work was long and really boring, except for moments of everything being loud and not working properly, so i was all nervous already. THEN some FUCKING ASSHOLE pulled his creeper truck up next to me on the STREET in the FUCKING DARK and was like "heeeyyy how far are you going baby?" and it was terrifying, especially since it was apparently drive your sketchy truck really slowly day, everyone was doing it. by the time i got home i was safe here i was just really really pissed. BUT THEN i read http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/americas/8245339.stm and cried like a fool.

i just read through that whole dumb-shit comment thread about the "abortuary" and IM SO SORRY and again applaud your ability to not be like LISTEN FUCKHEADS COOL IT WITH YOUR NONSENSE SHUUUUTTTUPPPPP. I was going to tell you which was my *favorite* douchenozzle, but then i realized the blinding hate blinded me. baaarrffff all over them. OOH actually i remembered, my favorite is that twatpaddle who was like, "um, first of all she could have just not had sex SLUT SHAAMMEE. also, adoptions are magic! everyone has one and being in the foster system doesn't suck at all!!"

congrats on getting your proof wooooooo! lauren, sam, alex, kate, how are classes? mariah! how's duke! jacob, uga? everyone else should tell me their news too!

- jack kerouac died like, down the street from me, at the hospital my morning bus passes. classy town.

-every class has a McDouchington. new college does not have a monopoly

( i'm a master )

big accidental three hour nap after dark, so sleeping at a reasonable hour appears unlikely. LUCKILY i just found an awesome new show that is Officially Recommended. Greek, which is all up on ze hulu, is made out of win. everyone is attractive, the script actually *mostly* sounds like humans are talking (big feat since it's an ABC Family original) basically just super entertaining and collegiate. The characters have all this secret depth, which is what im most impressed with. and, for lauren, somebody is leading a big gay double life, and i was surprised, not that you'll be. hahah. anyway, the show is good.

WOOO HAPPY FIRST DAY OF CLASSES

i loved seeing y'all last night, and we'll be back again soon!

one question: i came home in different shoes. were they acquired through socially acceptable means?

http://jezebel.com/5341749/glamour-shocks-readers-by-featuring-plus+size-models-belly

every time i watch mad men, it smells like cigarette smoke in here.

looks like there is a distinct possibility of an adam and jamie sojourn to the 307 saturday night. yesssss